sing the songs
2003-09-27 - 6:19 p.m.

Yesterday was physical therapy with Bennie. She made me do the leg exercises that I hate and I actually did them pretty well. It just frustrates me so when I’m trying with every fiber in my being to lift my leg up, and in my mind it’s lifted as high as the ceiling, but in reality its barely an inch. Ten repetitions of that usually puts me in a rather angry mood. Angry at me, angry at her, angry at my leg. The good thing is that I get over things pretty quickly so my anger subsides before she leaves and I can say “It was good to see you again!” and really mean it.

Kristy came over today and stayed for hours. We got to talk about what we’re each struggling with, friends from high school, how time and circumstances change people so drastically; just everything. A friend of ours is in need of some serious help and we don’t know how to handle it. It all stems from a breakup with a boyfriend which actually stems from a messed up family situation and she just can’t shake it off…so to speak. Kristy is going to bring her over here sometime so we can all talk. And not to sound self righteous or anything of the sort, but maybe she’ll see what my life is like now but also that I’m making it – I’m still living and it could always be worse. Or something like that.

I just noticed a weird feeling in my left index finger and its causing me concern. It feels as if it’s going numb, sort of tingling, and feels odd when it touches the keys of the computer. Maybe I’m developing one of the symptoms of C.I.D.P. that a lot of patients experience, but I never have. I’ve also noticed it a little in my right ring finger. I’m already sort of clumsy, I don’t need to lose feeling in my extremities – they are essential.

I made a deviantart account (aPlus). I don’t have much on there yet but I plan on taking more and doing more with photography so that’s where such things will be found (incase anyone was curious).